johnnynotsid

I miss you all.
I've been so busy and caught up in a bunch of shit. It's not fun.
Wanted to post my homecoming photos, but they're hideous. My dad takes bad pictures. Too bad, my dress was AWESOME.

Anyways, I've been really tired, but I've got a few things to say.

1) We all say and do things which have a prejudiced undercurrent or motivation or affect. It happens to the best of us. But just because we all do it does not make it okay. Acknowledge the error in what you're saying or doing, don't pretend you're not doing anything harmful or bad. When someone calls you out on it, deal. Try to fix it. Don't have a bitchfit trying to justify using gay as a synonym for bad. It's insensitive and offensive and harmful, acknowledge that you said something that was inappropriate, get over it, and try to fix it. Keep it in mind not to do that. No one is saying you're a bad or ignorant person necessarily, but you are if you refuse to acknowledge what you did and try to fix the situation. Because if you don't, it just proves your own cowardice and your lack of respect for acceptance and tolerance. It shows that you're fine with hate-speak if it means not admitting that you're not perfect or infallible. And that's disgusting.

2) I'm no longer going to describe people as "trash", nor will I refer to anyone as a slut, skank, cunt, scum, whore, ho, etc unless in a sarcastic context. Sure, I'm not going to stop being vulgar, but I'm not going to dehumanize people anymore. Every person is still a person no matter what their beliefs, actions, culture, or lifestyle. I didn't write to try and reduce people. I'm not into that. If I ever slip up, call me out on it. And I apologize for using those words in past blogs.

3) I miss you guys

Today a boy who is friends with a couple of my friends (but who I never really got too chummy with) said this to my friend and ex-boyfriend. I had come over to say Hello to my friend Patty (sakuraisinpanic) and My ex and his friend were with her. The dude, who I will call J, was trying to get my ex to admit to something (what, I don't know). Anyways, as I walked over, my ex was denying whatever it was and J was insisting he was lying.

"You're lying. I can tell. You've got that fag smile on your face."

Now, I love making fun of my ex. I always have, even before were were dating. But this pissed me off.

 "Don't say 'fag'."

He looked at me in his usual sullen expression which I think he believes looks intelligent (it seriously doesn't) and says, "Okay."
 He looks at my ex. "You're lying, I can tell. You're wearing that faggot smile."

He obviously thought this was very funny.

I glared. "Maybe you're such a dumbass as to not understand the mechanics of the English language, but the word faggot contains the word fag. You just said it again, you jerk. Not stop it with the fucking slurs."

"Why?"

"Because it's gay-bashing, you asshole."

"So? We're all straight here."

"That doesn't make hate-speech okay. Do you think it would be okay for me to call someone the N-Word just because there are no black people around?"

He SHRUGGED.

Not wanting to deal with him anymore, I sneered at him. "Someday, a sex tape of you and some other dude is going to end up on the internet. Only morons and closet-cases think talking like that is okay, and since you're obviously both, I see that very easily in your future."

And I walked away.

I told my friend Shalimar about it later. She later found J that day and told him she was very disappointed in him.

Seriously people, that shit isn't cool. Stop using slurs to insult people. It's one thing if you're Margaret Cho and describing what the term "fag-hag" means, quite another when you're actually branding something with an intolerant piece of hate-speech. It's not cool or edgy or interesting.

I was tagged by MiseryXChord

 

Dear loveit93:

I don't really know how to tell you this, but  you’re a pervert
I think I realized it on the First of May in your camping car and
I saw you ignore the crazy monk.
I'm sure you're mongolic enough to understand that we’re cousins
I'm returning the couch cushions to you, but I'll keep David’s tricot outfits as a memory.
You should also know that I told my confession today about a passionate interest for mice .

Greetings to your frog Leonard
Wendy

 

READ THE RULES


RULES:
Do the "The Letter MEME". Tag no less than 5 other people,
and leave them a comment, informing them that
they have been tagged. Then
copy the "How-to" Letter Meme, and finish your Journal entry.

-> How you do the Letter Meme:

Dear (the last person who left a comment on your journal):

I don't really know how to tell you this, but ___1___.
I think I realized it ___2___ ___3___ and
I saw you ___4___ ___5___.
I'm sure you're ___6___ enough to understand ___7___.
I'm returning ___8___ to you, but I'll keep ___9___ as a memory.
You should also know that ___10___ ___11___ .

___12___,
-Your name-

1. What's the color of your shirt?
Blue - Our romance is over
Red - Our affair is over
White - I'll join the monastery
Black - I dislike you
Green - Our horoscope doesn't match
Grey - You're a pervert
Yellow - I'm selling myself
Pink - Your nostrils are insulting
Brown - The mafia wants you
No shirt - You're a loser
Other - I'm in love with your sister


2. Which is your birth month?
January - That night
February - Last year
March - When your dwarf bit me
April - When I tripped on sesame seeds
May - First of May
June - When you put cuffs on me
July - When I threw up
August - When I saw the shrunken head
September - When we skinny dipped
October - When I quoted Santa
November - When your dog ran amok
December - When I changed tennis shoes


3. Which food do you prefer?
Tacos - In your apartment
Pizza - In your camping car
Pasta - Outside of Chicago
Hamburgers - Under the bus
Salad - As you ate enchilada
Chicken - In your closet
Kabob - With Paris Hilton
Fish - In women's clothing
Sandwiches - At the Hare Krishna graduation
Lasagna - At the mental hospital
Hot dog - Under a state of trance
None of the above - With George Bush and his wife


4. What's the color of your socks?
Yellow - Hit on
Red - Insult
Black - Ignore
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Pour syrup on
White - Carve your initials into
Grey - Pull the clothes off
Brown - Put leeches on
Orange - Castrate
Pink - Pull the toupee off
Barefoot - Sit on
Other - Drive out


5. What's the color of your underwear?
Black - My best friend
White - My father
Grey - Bill Clinton
Brown - My fart balloon
Purple - My mustard soufflé
Red - Donald Duck
Blue - My avocado plant
Yellow - My penpal in Ghana
Orange - My Kid Rock-collection
Pink - Manchester United's goalkeeper
None - My John F. Kennedy-statue
Other - The crazy monk


6. What do you prefer to watch on TV?
Scrubs - Man
O.C. - Emotional
One Tree Hill - Open
Heroes - Frostbitten
Lost - High
House - Scarred
Simpsons - Cowardly
The news - Mongolic
Idol - Masochistic
Family Guy - Senile
Top Model - Middle-class
None of the above - Ashamed


7. Your mood right now?
Happy - How awful I've felt
Sad - How boring you are
Bored - That Santa doesn't exist
Angry - That your pimples are at the last stage
Depressed - That we're cousins
Excited - That there is no solution to this.
Nervous - The middle-east
Worried - That your Honda sucks
Apathetic - That I did a sex-change
Ashamed - That I'm allergic to your hamster
Cuddly - That I get turned on by garbage men
Overjoyous - That I'm open
Other - That Extreme Home Makeover sucks


8. What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?
White - Your ring
Yellow - Your love letters
Red - Your Darth Vader-poster
Black - Your tame stone
Blue - The couch cushions
Green - The pictures from LA
Orange - Your false teeth
Brown - Your contact book
Grey - Our matching snoopy-bibs
Purple - Your old lottery coupons
Pink - The cut toenails
Other - Your memories from the military service


9. The first letter of your first name?
A/B - Your photo
C/D - The oil stocks
E/F - Your neighbour Martin
G/H - My virginity
I/J - The results of your blood-sample
K/L - Your left ear
M/N - Your suicide note
O/P - My common sense
Q/R - Your mom
S/T - Your collection of butterflies
U/V - Your criminal record
W/X - David's tricot outfits
Y/Z - Your grades from college


10. The last letter in your last name?
A/B - Always will remember
C/D - Never will forget
E/F - Always wanted to break
G/H - Never openly mocked
I/J - Always have felt dirty before
K/L - Will tell the authorities about
M/N - Told in my confession today about
O/P - Was interviewed by the Times about
Q/R - Told my psychiatrist about
S/T - Get sick when I think of
U/V - Always will try to forget
W/X - Am better off without
Y/Z - Never liked


11. What do you prefer to drink?
Water- Our friendship
Beer - Senility
Soft drink - A new life as a clone
Soda - The incarnation as an eskimo
Milk - The apartment building
Wine - Cocaine abuse
Cider - A passionate interest for mice
Juice - Oprah Winfrey imitations
Mineral water - Embarrassing rash
Hot chocolate - Eggplant-fetishism
Whisky - To ruin the second world war
Other - To hate the Boston Celtics


12. To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Thailand - Warm regards
USA - Best regards
England - Good luck on your short-term leave from jail
Spain - Go and drown yourself
China - Disgusting regards
Germany - With ease
Japan - Go burn
Greece - Your everlasting enemy
Australia - Greetings to your frog Leonard
Egypt - Fuck off now
France - In pain
Other - Greetings to your freaky family

I tag pattismithlives, breesays, ounceofwentz, faidtheforgotten, and stumped2011

Over the last few days, I’ve watched a couple of things: 1) An exhibition game between the Washington Capitals and The Philadelphia Flyers, 2) A Neurotically Yours cartoon entitle “Horror Flick Chicks”, and 3) the Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian.

Now, I’m not sure if anyone sensed this from my, let’s say, spirited style of writing, but I am not a naturally calm person. I’m lazy as Hell, but I am not a calm person. A lot of people think I am because I spend most of my time putting words to screen or paper, which requires heavy movement only in the hands and mind. People think if you are a more mentally-oriented person then that means you’re calm. This is incorrect. I’m an introverted Hurricane, bursting with ideas, comments, smart-ass rhetoric, and a lot of bad stories.

So no, I am not calm. I just have calm arms and legs. But not all the time.

Now, being an emotional and frenzied person, I like other things which I can direct my energy toward, especially when I have writer’s block. As a result, I like violence.

No, I am not a violent person. I don’t even play video games (parents never let me have so much as a Gameboy). But I like violence. I like witnessing it. No, I am not warlike and I am not a supporter of anything related to that. I prefer my violence to have a mental aspect to it, and to be direct and without harmful effects beyond what is unavoidable (World War II, for example. Lots of violence, lots of harm, but totally, and unfortunately, necessary). But I love violence in movies and I love violent humor and violent language, and, as I have recently discovered, I really like watching Hockey.

Hockey rules.

So, anyways, you’d think, since I like violence so much, that I would have enjoyed Prince Caspian. Half the movie is made up of battle scenes. And I loved all the battle scenes in Lord of the Rings, which made the movie watchable despite the fact that it was nine hours about a couple of Little dudes walking. Prince Caspian is (purposely) very much in the same style as The Lord of the Rings.

Prince Caspian sucked ass. Especially the Battle Scenes. Seriously, that was the most boring movie experience I’ve had since seeing Brideshead Revisited. Total snoozefest and epic fail. I’d take bigger emphasis on Christian beliefs any day over that.

And you know what I have figured out about the tedium that was Prince Caspian? Sure, the battle scenes had a LOT in common with Lord of the Rings: Crazy special effects, period setting, medieval weapons, mythical creatures, fight of good versus evil, a funny little dude, hot dudes, fighting chicks, and magic. But one thing that separated the Battle Scenes in Lord of the Rings and Narnia was this: Graphic content.

In Lord of the Rings, it wasn’t exactly a total bloodfest, but it was nt polished either. You saw the crazy deaths, mutilated flesh, blood, sweat, dead bodies, hysteria, rain, grime, ugliness and convulsions. In Narnia, you didn’t see Jack Shit. The worst was when you saw that gate go down on those poor rebel schmucks. Other than that: nothing. They probably needed a whole tube of makeup blood from Party City to cover that film. Their hair didn’t get messed up. The violence had no real impact. Sure, they beat each other over the head and ran at each other with heavy sharp objects, and it is heavily implied that there were some tragic deaths. BUT YOU SEE NO ONE TRULY GET HURT. The one time you actually see a good guy get truly wounded, he’s healed about fifteen seconds later. You get to see the bad guy go down with a roar and everyone lives happily ever after. La Dee Da.

Of course, the reasoning behind this is that this is a kid’s movie. A kid’s movie for “family-friendly” Disney audiences ages 3-14 and their parents. Lord of the Rings was for older audiences and had an R rating. Yeah. I get that. But it’s really, really stupid.

A lot of people like to bitch about violent video games and rap music corrupting America’s youth and driving them toward violent actions. Even though that’s been found to be bullshit by leading psychiatrists and behavioral specialists.

You know what I think is more likely to drive kids to violence? Showing them scenes where guns go off like mad and people knifing each other with no bloody residue. Heavy amounts of violence: no visible consequences. No blood. What sort of message do you think that sends to the minds everyone is branding as being so impressionable?

Yet it’s the stuff that shows the blood, and guts, and death that is tagged as being appropriate for more mature audiences. That’s right: the stuff that actually shows the actual effects of violent actions is reserved for those who already know that a twenty-gun shoot-out will, in fact, result in some bloodshed. But it’s the squeaky clean, consequence free physical brawls and weapon-fire we want kids to see. Because that way, they won’t have it fully ingrained as to what the consequences of firing a gun or fighting with a knife actually are. Oh no, we want them to think that aiming a bazooka and firing off a dozen bullets won’t actually hurt anybody. We don’t want them to see what the horrific nature of that stuff actually is. We just want them to see the firearms and fist fights without any real bad results.

Seriously, what the Hell do the people who make these decisions think they are doing? Do they actually think that this is a good idea? That shielding kids from the effect while promoting the cause like a new line of Bratz dolls is a good idea. Oh yeah, children, look! You can vent your aggression in the style of a homicidal maniac and no one gets hurt!

Come on, that’s basically what you see in the majority of these kids movies. People beating the shit out of each other and retaining at worst a loss of breath and a bead of sweat (unless they’re a bad guy, then they die with no visible carnage).

See, one of the things I like about the slasher flicks is that even though they do in fact have those obnoxious stupid, screaming, damsel-in-distress cliches, they at least show all the disgusting things that can come from contact with a sharp object and violent behavior.

Anyways, the realism of carnage makes a movie better anyways. That way there is a real payoff, outcome, and greater conflict. It’s better for the story and better for the kids.

So give me my violence with its gory outcome, please. Or else we’re just de-sensitizing the impressionable to aggressive behavior and just making it totally fake.

Keep it real, bitches, especially when it comes to blowing and beating the shit out of human beings.